Ocd is a nice lead indeed ^^

Ah, yes you’re right. And I think I feel the same. I can strive for perfection and know the best I can do is the best solution within my reach. Then, well, that’s the way to go.

My own philosophy/creed is based on Spinoza. I’ve seen a few parallels drawn between him and stoicism. I’ll definitely read about those. Thank you very much!

You’re right. And I make exceptions for these, I think I wrote it in my first post. When someone is mistreated, there’s no morality, for me, except an intervention, an angry one if need be.

But… There wouldn’t be any contradiction between trying your best to do the right thing and rewarding sex/finding a projets you’re passionate about. Or is there?

Well… If I had a bad day… that’s it. From quitting smoking, I understood this : There’s no virtue in guilt. Guilt will always make thing worse. The best and only thing to do is to fix what makes you guilty and if you can’t, get a good night of sleep.

When I wrote trying to act like a saint, it was a bit ironical, like I was trolling myself. But in practice, well, it looks quite similar.

But I’m trying to keep a calm mind. I learnt froo’ Spinoza a very emancipating way of thinking : “… as much as it is currently on oneself to”.

I’ve felt jealousy two times I think. Well. It means in the context I was in, given all the determinations of the situation, I could not feel anything beside jealousy. Then I’ll try to change the situation, playing on whatever parameters I can, to diminish the jealousy in favor of something else I feel more aligned to. It will or won’t work. If it doesn’t, well, no need to panick or feel guilty, I’ll have to try another way.

To answer your questions, the fear of judgment would certainly qualify. Fear of badness not so much. It’s always “as much as I can”. But some days, I can very little. I’ll try my best to do this very little.

And I don’t judge other people (as long as they’re not bosses, politicians, capitalists, etc). Even if they don’t care about morals as I do, they can still be decent individuals and strive with all their being got something else. Beauty, woodworking, fixing society, music, getting enough money to pay their mother a nice retirement house, becoming skilled martial artists, hiking in the country, finding nice mushrooms. I respect all those and recognize my brothers and sisters in them. My own morally-centered way is just… a way along others, it’s not better but it’s the one I’m drawn to.

Do you see what I mean?

Your last point is… where it all kinds falls off. I’m trying to learn about it. Be careful about myself. 8ve understood that’s what I have to learn, but it will take time. I understood it’s important, thanks to my therapist, thought. Thanks so much for your message!

Hmmm… If I drop a plate and it smashes, I won’t feel much. Maybe a bit pissed for 5 secs if I’m in a hurry. I’ll just take another. If a friends does it, I won’t react in any specific way. In both cases, there’s no… moral question involved for me, I think. Do you think there could be?

I’m striving to be as just and kind as it is possible in a given situation. And sincerely, I truly think I’m doing this for myself. Well, it’s complicated since I’m also the kind of person who tries to please everyone he loves. But… I feel my reward is not any praises, praises are bland, they don’t understand what is at play. Not points but searching for the best behavior, nourishing the best ideas, giving minimal place to the others.

I sincerely think I’m not considering myself better or worse than anyone. My way is a moral one. A certain of moral, as well. So that’s what I strive for. I totally admit other people could strive for something else entirely and I wish them luck in this, except if it’s toxic and power hungry.

So since I very rarely compare myself to others, the question of my value compared to theirs makes no sense for me. The question of my own value to my own eyes either. I am. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, even to myself. Being us enough.

But I find your answer very delicate, wise and kind so thank you very much for writing this, truly!

I can’t rule out pride being part a factor, it would be presomptuous, but I don’t feel that way. For a simple reason : I’m kinda unable to feel good or bad about myself. I can’t hold myself in high or low regard.

My impression, but maybe I’m wrong, is that I strive for some things and want to realize them fully. But other people may strive for something else entirely. It’s… hard, if not impossible to compare, don’t you think? I think I feel that way.

Some example would include helping strangers in multiple way, try to manage conflicts graciously, house homeless people, prep food for my roommates everyday, try my best to forgive people when they’re rude, standing for a bullied colleague, bring pastries to colleagues, drive give money to as many homeless people as I can, intervene in street fights to separate people, etc.

Thanks for your answer!

My current activities : -Finding caring doctors for an elderly woman

-Counsel colleagues at my work about mental health and/or unionization

-Help two refugees friends for their paperwork for citizenship.

I wish I could do more, but on top of work, I’m already exhausted.

Ah. Count me in. Gee… I was at work from 7:30AM to 7:30PM today, with an 1h commute. Tomorrow, I’ll regret it, but I’ll play Rimworld tonight.

Thomas Mathiesen has entered the chat

Ah, that’s a convincing point, but I’ve always felt my answer actually opens up the door for important discussions like :

-Historical // between slavery and prisons -Partial rebuttal of the question itself, or rather, its framing of the issue, my underlining it’s completely legitimate to advocate for the abolition of something without having a plug’n’play replacement for it

-Usually, people will follow up by highlighting cases of pedophiles and rapists, which could further be used to frame the discussion with them : who are we talking about?

-If I’m in a bad mood, I’ll also ask people : “My brother in Christ, weren’t there folks around who thought slavery was indeed created to solve an actual problem?”

But yeah, that’s only the first part of my answer, then we’ll move to the more grounded post-carceral society discussion.

Well, I can try to clarify here. Some prison abolitionist, activist or scholars, do indeed think there will be a residual proportion on crime that will necessitate kind of spatial segregationi, and, for some, being locked up for a time.

And it’s not necessarily conflicting with the abolitionist motto. They say : Well, prisons are buildings, but mostly, they are a social and historical function (punishing the poor, the political opposition, etc.). If we abolish that and there are like 3000 people in prison nationwide, the logic of stockpiling inmates will be gone. Maybe it will be possible to actually do something for them. The gap in punishment between the poor and the rich will be reduced if not gone.

Nevermind the building. If their historical function is gone, prisons are gone.

Ah. I’m not so comfortable with English but yeah, that was what I meant indeed!

That’s always my first answer indeed. "Well, I’m going to answer your question but first, just think about the abolition of legal slavery a while ago. What would you have thought about someone who would object : “yeah, but what will we replace slavery with ?”.

Well, that would reduce unemployment.

Thanks for taking the time to write such a detailed answer. I agree with you about almost everything.

You seem to be pretty up voted on a regular basis except a few comments. In my humble opinion, most of them would not be explained by a specific reddit hive mind but rather classic moral panics. I mean, I’ve been campaigning my whole life for prison reform/abolition and that’s the typical kind of reactions I’ve got… irl. I suppose that’s just what you usually get when saying something which deviates from a specific state of public opinion.

Not trying to play ackshually, but there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with your posts/comments, imo.